Wednesday, May 16, 2012

5 Years on - Stronger

We celebrated our 5th anniversary over the weekend. We had a blast with a big group of family and friends. It was touching and intimate, and it was extremely fun. Oh and the food was great. We still can't believe that we've been married for half a decade. It felt short, but at the same time felt as though we've been together forever (in a good way).  5 years on, I know this marriage has been strengthened, refined and our love has gone deeper. I used to fantasize a wedding and marriage filled with romance and surprises and somehow along the years I was still hit with bouts of insecurity of whether such would ever be fulfilled and if I would ever learnt to be contented. As we crossed the midnight mark stepping into our 6th year of marriage, I closed my eyes and asked God for His word. It was contentment, I suddenly could look back at everything with eyes of contentment of what God has given to me. It was beautiful. I recalled my wedding as a wonderful memory, the times of disappointments I couldn't seem to let go over the years became lessons learnt and forgiven and most importantly, the 5 years of walking through the ups and downs were the best thing that has ever happened. I know Kel better and I know how much I am loved and cherished. Not a single doubt. I suddenly understood contentment. I think the past one year has shaped us (me especially) into  new people and I confidently say the old has gone. 

I remember the day after diagnosis, I had conversation with Ailing (Kel's elder sis) and she said that her brother is the best person to walk through this journey with me. I couldn't agree more, because over the months, so many people have commented on how amazing Kel has been. I couldn't agree more. I have never seen him as steady as this and he has been my pillar in every area. 

We are so different. The marriage prep test we took before we got married exposed our differences. We got married and there was no end to comparing our different we are. We laugh about them, we bicker, we argue, we cry over them. At some point we were so helpless that we thought, maybe we need some help to deal with our differences. But one thing I took my hat off is that he has never given up. Despite having difficulties to express himself like any other guy, he strived to communicate his thoughts, he took so much efforts to be the man to me. Today, he picks up my dirty laundry, he washes all my dishes, he picks up my shoes. He bathes Janice, he puts her to bed, he attends to all our needs. Janice and I are very blessed. 

I have learnt to sit back over the year to enjoy this wonderful relationship God has given to me. I realized that I have been too critical and harsh towards Kel and towards myself over the years. Sitting back has caused me to learn contentment and just giving thanks to my mighty God who knows me best to have provided for me the best. Someone who is so different but accepting of every part of me. Someone who is willing to complement my weaknesses with his strength without a single word of complaint. Someone who has never stopped loving despite my hurtful words in midst of my pain. Someone whom I can stroke his hair and his back whilst he's asleep, just thanking God that we are husband and wife. Someone whom I know Janice is in good hands because his love is sacrificial and unpretentious. 

Happy 5th Anniversary my darling. We enter into our 6th year looking up and holding tight to His grace. I love you more each day. really....

 With continuous joy and laughter .... 
and with a deep gratitude. I will cherish you, many, many years to come .... 

Love, Wifey

5th Anniversary Video

I couldn't upload this on Fb, hope this channel works! Thank you Vic, Lucia and Jia Jia for putting this touching video together. I had to hide in my hall and watch it again, holding Kel's hands and crying :)
From L-R: Vic, Me, JJ, Lucia, XD, Lynn


From L-R: Vic, Me, JJ, Lucia, XD, Lynn

We had an awesome weekend of celebrations. Our 5th wedding anniversary fell on Saturday, 12 May and it was also Mothers' Day yesterday. Before I blog about the wonderful husband I have and my thoughts about the 5th Year, I thought I will write about a group of very important people in my life.

I am very blessed to have met these group of girlfriends in SAJC (2 more girls missing: Yetty and Lilin). Ok, Lynn was kind of a special friend out of the group (one of my ang moh speaking friends - haha) and the rest of 7 of us kind of hung out almost everyday. Anyway before I go on about our history, I want to say a big thank you to you girls in the pic. I booked the venue for my anniversary party, sent out invites via FB but the mastermind behind the touching and fun party were them. Vic took up the role as the event organizer (once a bridesmaid, always a bridesmaid) and she did her delegation: slideshow, games, decor, photo booth, sharing etc. I did nothing and just dressed up and rock up to the party. Even the dress was chosen by Vic and the make up half done by JJ. Thank you, it was exactly how I'd love the party to be and I know you girls made it possible because you love me (us - esp Janice)

I realized I seldom make much mention of my friends on FB/Blog. But you girls have been pivotal in so many junctures of my life. I remembered being reluctant to be in SAJC, Arts faculty, but 2 years there turned out to be one of the best years of my life, mainly because of the friends I made. I can't believe we have grown up together for the past XX years and walked each other through different phases of life. I remembered Vic once shared in my wedding that majority of our friendship was spent long distant (with me spending 11 years in Brisbane) but I can't express how glad to be back in Singapore enjoying the friendship in closer proximity. I thank God for no barriers even after more than a decade being away and I look forward to every single meet up and catch up.

Thank you for taking the effort to visit me and encourage me through this time (plus traveling!). It must have been shocking/hard for you to hear the news when I fell sick and I think we all had some form paradigm shift about life. One of the things I thought about was for Janice to be able to spend as much time with you girls because that's where she's also going to get a dose of who mummy's friends are and how mummy is like. So thank you for loving me, for loving Janice and for the smiles and encouragements you have given to me. You girls are the "bestest" friends anyone could have. I love you!

p.s. Lilin and Yetty, I'm still waiting for two of you to be back!!! :)